Don't Let Your Bad Experiences Hurt You     Everyone of us does go through hard times in life. Not always does life turn out to be the way we want it to be and we end up having some unpleasant memories. It is tough to deal with it, but as they say the show must go on and so we need to accept them take them in our stride and move on in life. Forgiveness is vital for us to move on. Dont cling on to those memories. If someone hurt you, just forgive them and make your life better. Constantly analyzing the past in search of finding blame, including finding ways of blaming yourself, rarely leads to a positive result. Normally when you have a negative experience, it will have an initial negative and emotional impact on you for a while, but after a period, you will start to focus on other things and your brain will process the emotion and the memory will be filed as over and in the past tense and the impact will fade. But for some people, especially if the experience is of a horrific nature, they can often struggle to process the memory and the emotional experience. It’s usually the case that a whole number of factors lead to the result you’re now experiencing everything acts like a domino with one thing leading to another. Just accept it: what happened, happened.The logical sequence of events would have been that the person would not have been so cruel to begin with, and that anyone who would have been so cruel would have apologized. You brain is waiting on the appropriate response. You cannot literally just erase or wipe out your bad memories because there are etched and engrained into your life story and experience, in other words they are a part of you. What you can and probably should do though is, you can detach the negative emotions and the stressful physical responses, which are causing you all the pain, away from the memory, so the bad experience becomes neutral and no longer relevant and significant. We often tend to imagine what we could have said or done differently to avoid the bad things that happened. But this is no different from trying to change what happened a thousand years ago it’s quite impossible. So behave differently: fill your mind with alternative thoughts. Psychologists argue that powerful positive ideas can help you get off the endless track of negative thoughts. Imagine yourself doing something new and exciting or actually plan something fun for the coming days. Also Staying busy and hobbies is helpful as a tactic to cope with recurring issues. seek the help of a support group, engage in social activities - even if you have to force yourself at first. You may also want to occupy your time with exercise, reading and music. Seek spiritual consultation, or if you are finding it especially difficult to move past your experience, you may want to begin counseling. All this can help you move past a bad experience, but the most important thing to keep in mind is that what you are feeling is natural, so let yourself feel those emotions and know that it will get better. ..Divya

    Innovative Decorations for Durga Puja     Decorating for Indian festivals is one most cherished feature of the Indian culture, the families, relatives and friends get along and decorate the mandaps, home exteriors, temples, streets etc. The budget for decorating supplies usually exceeds the limit and some are left dissatisfied even after spending hours to shop for the supplies and sitting to decorate. Sometimes, we have opinions such as 'why spend so much for a festival that comes once a year' or even thoughts like ' lets buy a permanent decorative stuff to put up every year' but which turns out to be boring to see the same stuff every year and for every festival.     Here are some ideas to economically and ecologically decorate indoors and outdoors for the festivals. Ideas such as utilising the gift packaging paper or tissue papers that came for Birthdays and other Ceremonies and are lying around crumbled already. Large Pom Pom garlands resemble the Marigold garlands and dont fade or wither away like the real flower garlands do and are eco-friendly too if used-paper is put to good purpose instead of just throwing it away..and the whole idea is economical, all we need is just some glue and a long thread or string to hang the garland. Even, strips of dress materials in bright festive colors like Maroon, Gold, Green and Red can be made into tassles and garlands hung around windows and doors or across the street, the same idea can be followed with used tissue papers.     Using a green cardboard and a stencil of mango leaf, several leaves can be cutout and smaller pom poms made with orange or yellow colored tissue papers for a marigold or chrysanthemum effect and strung alternative to make a garland and this creates an ultimate festive look that stays longer..just make sure this decor stays away from rain and too much humidity otherwise the flower effect becomes soggy. Like the way Clay Ganesha idol making is being encouraged to replace the harmful Plaster of Paris idols, these repurposed garlands for decoration are a responsible way of festivities and celebrations. Have a better Dussera this year !     ..Prathyusha

    నిర్భయ పాత్రగా కామిక్‌ పుస్తకం   2012 డిసెంబరు 16. ఆ రోజు దిల్లీలో జరిగిన ఘాతుకం, ప్రపంచం ముందు మన దేశం తలదించుకునేలా చేసింది. ‘యత్ర నార్యస్తు పూజ్యంతే’ అని శ్లోకాలలో చెప్పిన నీతిసూక్తులు, స్త్రీల శోకాన్ని నివారించలేకపోయాయని తేల్చిపడేసింది. ఆనాడు నిర్భయ అనే మహిళ మీద సామూహిక అత్యాచారం, హత్య జరిగిన తీరుతో భారతీయ సమాజం ఉలిక్కిపడింది. అప్పటిదాకా నిశ్శబ్దంగా ఉన్న యువత ఒక్కసారిగా వీధుల్లోకి వచ్చింది. ఫలితం! స్త్రీల మీద ముఖ్యంగా భారతీయ స్త్రీల మీద జరుగుతున్న అత్యాచారాల గురించిన చర్చ మొదలైంది. ఎలాగైనా సరే వీటిని అడ్డుకోవాలనీ, ఇలాంటి సంఘటనలకు పాల్పడేవారిని కఠినంగా శిక్షించాలనే స్వరాలు పెరిగాయి.   నిర్భయ ఉదంతం ‘రామ్‌ దేవినేని’ అనే చిత్ర నిర్మాతని కూడా కదిలించింది. నిర్భయకాండకు వ్యతిరేకంగా జరిగిన ఒక ప్రదర్శనలో రామ్‌ మిత్రుడు ఒకరు పాల్గొన్నారు. ఆ మిత్రుడు అక్కడ ఉన్న ఓ పోలీసుని- ‘నిర్భయ ఉదంతం మీద మీ అభిప్రాయం ఏంటి?’ అని అడిగాడు. దానికి ఆ పోలీసు చాలామందిలాగే- అంత రాత్రివేళ తిరగడం ఎందుకు? అన్నట్లుగా మాట్లాడాడు. నిర్భయ వంటి ఉదంతాల పట్ల సమాజం చూపించే ఇలాంటి ధోరణిలో మార్పు తీసుకురావాలనుకున్నాడు రామ్‌. ఆడవారు బయట తిరగడం, ఆధునిక దుస్తులు ధరించడం... ఆఖరికి నవ్వడం కూడా వారిని అత్యాచారం చేసేందుకు కవ్విస్తున్నాయి అని భావించే అహంకారమే అసలు నేరం అని రామ్‌కు తోచింది.   తన మనసులోని అవేశానికి ఒక రూపాన్నిచ్చే ముందు రామ్‌, చాలామంది అత్యాచార బాధితులను కలిశాడు. అత్యాచారానికి గురైన తరువాత వారి జీవితాలు మరింత దుర్భరంగా మారిపోతున్నాయని గ్రహించాడు. అత్యాచార బాధితులు న్యాయం సాధించాలంటే ఒక యుద్ధమే సాగించాలి. ఆ యుద్ధంలో ఎవ్వరూ తోడురారు సరికదా, కుటుంబం కూడా వారిని వెలివేసేందుకే సిద్ధపడుతుంది. ఈ పరిస్థితిని ప్రతిబించేందుకు రామ్ ఒక కామిక్‌ పాత్రను సృష్టించాలనుకున్నాడు. ‘డాన్‌ గోల్డ్‌మన్‌’ అనే చిత్రకారునితో కలిసి ప్రియ అనే పాత్రను సృష్టించాడు. ఈమె కూడా నిర్భయలాగానే సామూహిక అత్యాచారానికి గురవుతుంది. ఆ తరువాత నలువైపుల నుంచీ తనే నిందలు పడటంతో పార్వతీదేవిని ధ్యానిస్తుంది. పార్వతీదేవిలోని శక్తి ప్రియని ఆవహించడంతో దుష్టలను ఎదుర్కోగలుగుతుంది. తనకు జరిగిన అన్యాయాన్ని నిర్భయంగా వెల్లడించగలుగుతుంది. ప్రజల్లోని అజ్ఞానాన్ని రూపుమాపేందుకు పోరాడి జయిస్తుంది.   రెండు సంవత్సరాల క్రితం ‘Priya’s Shakti’ పేరుతో వచ్చిన ఈ కామిక్‌ సంచలనం సృష్టించింది. ప్రపంచ బ్యాంకు, ఫోర్డ్‌ ఫౌండేషన్‌ వంటి సంస్థలు సైతం ఈ ప్రాజెక్టుకి సాయం చేసేందుకు ముందుకువచ్చాయి. పలు అంతర్జాతీయ అవార్డులూ లభించాయి. లింగవివక్షకు వ్యతిరేకంగా పోరాడిన విజేత అంటూ ఐక్యరాజ్యసమితి కితాబునిచ్చింది. లక్షలాదిమంది ఈ పుస్తకాన్ని డౌన్లోడ్ చేసుకున్నారు. ఆ పుస్తకం ఆధారంగా రూపొందిన యాప్‌ సైతం ప్రజాదరణ పొందింది. అదే ఉత్సాహంతో ఇప్పుడు రామ్‌ బృందం 'Priya's Mirror’ అనే మరో కామిక్‌ పుస్తకాన్ని రూపొందించింది. ఇందులో అహంకారం అనే రాక్షసుని చెరలోంచి యాసిడ్‌ బాధితులను కాపాడే శక్తిగా ప్రియ కనిపిస్తుంది. సెప్టెంబరు 30 నుంచి అక్టోబరు 6 వరకు జరిగే న్యూయార్క్‌ ఫిల్మ్‌ ఫెస్టివల్‌లో ఈ పుస్తకాన్ని విడుదల చేయనున్నారు.   ప్రపంచవ్యాప్తంగా వందకోట్ల మందికి పైగా స్త్రీలు ఏదో ఒకరకమైన హింసను ఎదుర్కొంటున్నారని ప్రపంచ ఆరోగ్య సంస్థ తేల్చి చెబుతోంది. సిగ్గుచేతనో, భయం వల్లనో... చాలామంది తాము ఎదుర్కొన్న దౌర్జన్యాన్ని తమలోనే దాచుకుని కుమిలిపోతుంటారు. నిత్యం నరకాన్ని అనుభవిస్తుంటారు. ఇలాంటి Gender-based sexual violence (GBV)ని ఎదుర్కొనేందుకు రామ్ రూపొందించిన ప్రియ పాత్ర ఎంతోకొంత ప్రేరణని అందిస్తుందని ఆశిద్దాం. (ప్రియ పాత్రగా వచ్చిన రెండు పుస్తకాలను చదివేందుకు, ఉచితంగా డౌన్లోడ్ చేసుకునేందుకు ని చూడగలరు) - నిర్జర.

    Over-the-door storage     With the increase in Apartment living, the available space has decreased too...everyone is looking for smart storage ideas like Under-the-bed, collapsible and the often heard of, Over-the-door storage solutions. Reduce the number of small jewellery boxes and watch boxes with these storage options, as they have numberous hooks and hangers for necklaces, finger rings, earrings, bracelets and what not. Some even come with a secret shelf to hide away cash and valaubles. With Lock and Key facility to a few little expensive cabinets like these, safeguarding ornaments is easier...noone even finds where you have kept away all your stuff.     Dont have a door to hang it, some can even stand strong on the floor with a mirror too and some against the wall. For the teenage girls' room, there are some fashionable options with lesser hooks and shelves and a slimmer and less weight finish made of metal whereas usually these cabinets are made of wood and come in various exterior finish options to choose from such as White, Cherry wood, Black and Brown. And the colorful ones come in Pink, Ombre, purple etc. we found some smaller table top cabinets also that can be hung over the door when you have a change of mind.     Whoever designed these, have smartly made them as multipurpose items...for use by Men to hang their ties and bows, belts and watches and hide away wallets and wedding rings or even cash cheques. These can be of good help in the craft room to store ribbons, gift packing items and such. Take them into the bathroom to store the toiletries and keep your sink top clear of the facewash and toothpaste tubes. Smart storage, isn't it ? So when are you ordering for you? Browse the web for quite some well known online shopping sites such as Amazon, in USA on HSN, QVC, you will find many options and the regular furniture stores are selling them too...infact, any named carpenter can make you a customised piece.  BTW, these Over-the -Door storage caninets are good as HouseWarming gifts!!     ..Prathyusha

    DIY Wall-Hanger storage for Dolls     Little girls at home and you will very soon see dolls and dolls everywhere at your home..keep tidying up but the mess comes around, and sometimes you are not permitted to cleanup, but it is only 'mess up time'. Shove all the toys in a big basket and the kids pull out each of them everytime they look for just one, and so the basket storage idea is not a clever one. With my little girl in her fourth year and fascinated with dolls and barbies, it all started with just one doll and within a year, she now has 10 dolls totally. With hours of cleaning up after her friends' visits and her playtime, i got so tired and one day an idea struck...for peace of mind...a wall hanging storage bag for all her dolls.     To make one, We need 6"x4" Felt material pieces - 8 Sewing machine or thread and needle to sew A pair of scissors A childrens dress hanger Firstly, arrange sets of two felt pieces vertically and horizontally across eachother and start sewing them with pockets for the dolls as shown in the picture. Now attach the sets one below the other for a vertical hanger. The top felt set needs a pocket backing to hold the dress hanger and sew the edges to lock the hanger inside. This gives a nice place to keep away all the dolls, a clean floor and an intelligent idea to display the nice dolls collection your child has, why would you not want to show off the expensive, beautiful dolls she has!!     ..Prathyusha

Revamp a damaged Hat Hats and Caps we buy to accessorise our kids or even for ourselves, to use them on 'some fine daywhich never comes', tend to loose that charm as kids over use them or we never use them. Tell me if there are no such items that are lying in your craft corner or in your shelf waiting for a makeover! I have oh-somany....buttons, ribbons, ear hangings, hair bands and etc..... I recently found one such beautiful hat i got home for my little girl early this year and it lost a ribbon already. I kept it aside for a makeover and soon forgot. I needed a hat for her again last month as Summer evaded. Thats when i hunted Hobby Lobby, our famous, huge craft store only to find two cute purple flowers waiting just for me in the Clearance section for just 2 bucks. To me, it was a Try it and Like it or Leave it - kind of a fix. I needed: That hat which seriously screams for help Hot glue ( fabric glue doesnot help as my hat wasnot cotton made, it was synthetic wire.) Embellishments such as flowers, stones, ribbons etc A pair of scissors incase     My old hat had the remains of glue from the ribbon it lost, so firstly, i scraped the leftover glue and cleared the surface. Then, i began to think of adding a ribbon too but the ribbon edges might fade away and stones might fall off, hence, they were eliminated from my Necessities list and the flowers remained. I tried using fabric glue but the materials were silky and the hat was not cotton-made so the flowers fell off quickly. Then, hot glue was my only option. I simply applied the two flowers using hot glue and there you go my daughter who ddnt like the same hat earlier, now wore it even while sitting in the car. It was just a 2bucks fix !! Pratyusha

    Breast Milk, A Boon To Premature Babies     Brain development in Premature Babies tackled with Breast Milk From ages, Women have been encouraged to breast feed their new borns, until atleast the child is 12months old, possibly. Very few Women are heard to be not interested in nursing their children due to changes in physical body as they cannot diet and shape up their bodies after weight gain during pregnancy and post-delivery stages. It is a myth that breast feeding causes shapeless infact, helps loose weight, post-partum. Breast feeding is so famously known to fight cancers, sametime, a breast-fed child has increased immunity compared to those babies who were less or never breast fed. A study has found out that Breast Milk helps brain development in premature babies, significantly.     Preterm birth is a scare among expectant parents due to its many negative effects troubling the baby on the long run and has been linked with Psychiatric and Neurological problems that may show up as age progresses. In this path, a new study has found success and an affordable, reachable solution. Breast Milk is found to be a boon for all those parents who are worried about their newborns' brain developement, at this stage. Most Mothers can nurse, actively, even before they finish full-term pregnancy while the Babies are very weak and, most of the times, cannot learn to suck breast milk on their own, hence offering breast milk with a small nursing bottle is a good idea. Incase, the Mom's body is not ready to nurse yet, Breast Milk can be borrowed from other Mothers, who are kindly ready to donate it. A Washington University School of Medicine study has revealed a major role played by Breast Milk in the lives of prematurely born babies, in which, over 70 babies born atleast 14weeks before their full nine-month term were the test subjects. Regularly after their preterm birth, every baby's brain was scanned in comparison with the amount of Breast milk he/she received while still in the NeoNatal Intensive Care Unit, here Breast Milk was either offered by their respective Mothers or other Moms. It was found by the Researchers and Physicians that Babies who received often and more Breast milk had shown larger brain developments, while Preterm babies who were not the test subjects in the past didnot have much brain development and also several other studies showed a correlation between brain volume and cognitive development. Inorder to help Children and families, who, due to various reasons, face Preterm births, Researchers pledge to continue studying this subject.   ...Prathyusha

    Foods that Improve Lactation   Breast feeding has long been associated with the health and immunity of a child. And mothers do often find ways to provide heart full of milk to their kids. Many supplements were readily available in the market for feeding mothers. But what about the days when we are devoid of any commercial products to improve mother’s milk. Our elders used some time tested foods that are readily and naturally available within their reach. Spinach: Most of the women would turn anaemic after delivering a baby. The Iron and Folic acid in the Spinach would let them regain the strength and produce enough milk. The nutrients in Spinach would also help their kids to grow stronger and healthier. Spinach is also known to prevent breast cancer which could be an added benefit. But there is a warning attached to the usage of Spinach! Too much of Spinach can affect the digestion of baby as well as mother. Garlic: Garlic has been used for centuries to increase lactation. Though there has been little research to support the belief, experts feel that the taste of garlic in mother’s milk be attracting the children to suck more milk. Besides, garlic helps mother to regain from the post pregnancy illness. A few cloves of garlic can be added in dishes or can be fried along with ghee. Gourd Vegetables: Elders would always advice to include vegetables like Bottle gourd and Snake gourd in the diet of nursing mothers. Gourd vegetables are easy to digest, low in calories and high in nutrition. Besides the high water content in them would keep nursing mothers stay hydrated. With all such benefits, how can we strike off the advice given by our elders? Papaya: Traditional medicine practitioners suggest eating Papaya for better lactation. But we have to be sure that it is not ripe. It’s not only nutritious for mothers but also helps them in giving much milk. Besides, Papaya works like a mild sedative that helps mothers to relax between their busy schedules. Fenugreek:  It’s another time tested suggestion to improve lactation. No one was sure about the reason, but everyone was confident about its working. Usage of Fenugreek is known to increase lactation up to 900%. Fenugreek seeds are filled with vitamins and minerals that are good for baby as well as mother. Further the Omega 3 fatty acids in these seeds help the development of baby. To add to the above list-  numerous foods such as carrots, fennel seeds, oats, salmon, almonds, basil leaves, drumstick, sesame seeds, cumin seeds... would certainly help the feeding mothers to improve their lactation.   - Nirjara.  

  The Concept of Onam Sadhya Welcoming the King   God’s Own Country Kerala is a delight to be in during Onam as the state comes alive with flowers, singing,play , fun. The harvest festival is celebrated in Kerala to mark the return of King Mahabali, who is a legend ruled the state once, under whom the people were equal, prosperous and happy.  This is a 10 day festival. Onam Sadhya, a 26 dish vegetarian feast which is served on the 8 , 9 and 10th day of Onam. Sadhya in Malayalam, means a banquet. It is the elaborate vegetarian meal, traditionally served on a mat laid on the floor. The dishes are served on a plantain leaf.  The making and the eating of the Onam sadya  is a noon meal.     The biggest Sadhya is serve at  Pardasardi temple in Aramula ,   64 items is made for the Aranmula boatrace, a popular event conducted during Onam There is a popular Malayali saying, "Kanam Vittu Onam Unnanam", which means "We should have the Thiruvonam lunch even if it costs us to sell our properties". There is even a distinct order in the way the food is served on the banana leaf. Pappadumis placed on the extreme left of the leaf. On the top of the big pappadum, banana is served. Starting from the right of the papad, salt, sarakarapuratti and banana wafers are placed. Only after this, ginger lime and mango pickles are served on the leaf. On the right, 'cabbage thoran' is served. Finally avial and kuttu curry are served   Home Maker and Cook Ginu Vinu , who has married  psychologist  A P J Vinu and settled in kakinada, recalls here onam celebrations during here stay in kerala, specailly for cooking for ona sadya was a family team work, and we enjoy evey part of the process , i cook all the kerala varities of sadya and invite malyai and non malyalee friends for sadhya in kakianda during this 10 days of celeberations.  “You must end the feast with curd rice and top it off with a plantain. Your stomach will settle down and digestion will be easy,”  “I always pray before I start cooking and I ask god for good health and seek his blessings,”   which is the secret of my tasty cooking.            'Payasam', a sweet and tempting porridge is one of the favourite desserts served for sadhya atleast 4 different variety of payasam/pradaman are served along with Parippu, Sambar, Rasam, Pulisseri, Kaalan, Avial, Thoran, Olan, Pachadi, Mango pickle, Naranga curry, Papadum, Banana, Curd or Buttermilk, and plantain chips. The main dish is plain boiled rice, served along with other dishes collectively called Kootan curries, which include curries like Kaaya varuthatha (banana chips),  Chena varuthatha (yam chips),  Sarkara upperi (Jaggery coated banana chips)  lime pickle  kaduggu maga Achar  ( mango pickle) Olan ( a puli inji (tamarind & ginger chutney)  Theeyal (mixed vegetable gravy),  Erissery (mashed beans and pumpkin with coconut gravy), Kichadi (Gourd in mildly spiced yoghurt),  Avial  (Mixed vegetable , coconut curry) Puliserry (yogurt based curry),  Kootu curry (black chickpeas curry),  Sambar Rasam  Bananas  Papad  Payasam         How is it Served There is a distinct order of serving the the grand feast of Onam. Pappad or Pappadum is to be served on the extreme left. On top of the big pappadum banana is served.  From the right pappad - salt, banana wafers, sarkarapuratti fries are served.  After this, ginger lime and mango pickles are served.  Next comes 'vellarika', 'pavakka', beetroot and 'ullikitchadi'. 'Kitchadi' made of pineapple and banana splits or of grapes and apple is served along with this. On the right, 'cabbage thoran' is served. Then comes a thoran made of beans and avil followed by bread and green peas mix 'thoran'. The meal will be complete with the 'avial' and 'kootu curry'. Rice is served when the guests seat themselves and just two big spoons is considered enough.  After this 'parippu' and ghee is poured.  Then comes Sambhar. Desserts are to begin with adaprathaman followed by 'Kadala Payasam'.  This colourful arrangement on the lush green banana leaf makes the food look even more tempting and irresistible . SADYA ON BANANA LEAF Eating food on a banana leaf is considered healthy. Placing hot food on the leaves emanates several nutrients that enrich  food. It also adds to the aroma of food and enhances the taste. Leaf is folded and closed once the meal is finished. Closing the leaf towards you (top to bottom – inward) signifies complete satisfaction with the food and closing it away from you would mean a signal to the cooks that it needs improvement. At the end of the meal, the right corner of the leaf is slit upward to signify that the leaf has already been used. Apparently people polished all this off so spotlessly that often it was hard to make out if the leaf was used or not! And turning it toward oneself is a subtle message to the cook,  that there is room for improvement and folding it away from yourself, obviously means complete and utter satisfaction. Avial - Real Kerala Curry  a must on onam Sadhya No Sadhya or a festive gathering is complete without Avial.   Avial is a delicious blend of mixed veggies in coconut and yogurt mixture. Seasoned with curry leaves and coconut oil, Avial is a nutritious as well as traditional dish in Kerala cuisine. Avial  is a complete vegetables like, cucumber, tomato,  brinjal, elephant yam, carrot, drumstick, potato, snake gourd,   beans, plantain etc as per choice.  It is supposed to have been invented by Bhima (one of the Pandava brothers) during their exile. According to the legend, when Ballav (Bhima’s name during this time) assumed his duties as the cook in the kitchen of Virata, did not know how to cook. One of the first things he did was to chop up many different vegetables, boil them together and top the dish with grated coconut.  Stories connected to Avail Curry  The  mythology  story in connection with Avail curry. Bheema is said to have prepared Avial, when there were unexpected guests for King Virata and he needed to serve meals for them. There was no sufficient vegetables to cook any single recipe for side dish, so Bheema used what ever available vegetables to make a new dish, which came to know as Avial.     Written by Ginu Vinu Cook and Home maker vaidyangar , Ramanayyapeta, kakinada, Andhra pradesh

  గౌరీ తనయం నమాంమ్యహం!     మన పండగల్లో రెండు రకాలుంటాయి! కొన్ని మగవాళ్ల పండుగలు, కొన్ని ఆడవాళ్ల పండుగలు! అదేంటి అంటారా? అన్ని పండుగలు అందరూ చేసుకోవాల్సినవే అయినా కొన్నిటికి మగవాళ్ల హడావిడి ఎక్కువగా వుంటుంది. మరికొన్నిటికి ఆడవాళ్ల హంగామా ఎక్కువగా వుంటుంది.  ఉదాహరణకి మొన్నే వచ్చిపోయిన జంధ్యాల పున్నమ తీసుకోండి! ఆ రోజు మగవాళ్లే ఎక్కువగా పండగ జరుపుకుంటూ వుంటారు. అయితే, ఉత్తరాది నుంచి వచ్చిన రక్షాబంధన్ ఈ మధ్య బాగా పాప్యులర్ అవ్వటంతో అమ్మాయిలకు, ఆడవాళ్లకు కూడా ఆ రోజు కావాల్సినంత సరదా దొరుకుతోంది. రాఖీలు కడుతూ ఒకప్పటి తెలుగు వారి జంధ్యాల పున్నమని రాఖీల పున్నమగా మార్చేశారు!  సరే... అయితే... ఇంతకీ వినాయక చవితి ఎవరి పండుగ? ఓ కోణంలో చూస్తే మగవాళ్లదే! ఎందుకంటే, ఇంట్లో పెట్టే వినాయక విగ్రహాల వద్ద పూజలు చేయటం మొదలు రోడ్లపైన వెలిసే భారీ గణనాథుల వరకూ అంతటా మగవారిదే రాజ్యం! ఆడవాళ్లకు ఏం ప్రమేయం వుండదని కాకపోయినా ప్రసాదాలు చేయటం వంటి పనులు మాత్రమే స్త్రీలు చేస్తుంటారు! ఈ మధ్య కాలంలో అయితే సాయంత్రం అయ్యేలోపు పండగ పని కానిచ్చి టీవీల ముందు కూర్చుండిపోతున్నారు మాడన్ లేడీస్! ఇంకా ఓపిక వున్న కొందరైతే అలా ఫ్యామిలీతో కలిసి బయటకు వెళ్లి వినాయక మండపాలు చూసి వస్తుంటారు! ఇంతే తప్ప వినాయక చవితితో పెద్దగా కనెక్ట్ అవ్వటానికి వనితలకు ఏం కనిపించదనే చెప్పాలి! వినాయక చవితికి , ఆడవాళ్లకి పెద్దగా సంబంధం లేదనేస్తారేంటి అనుకుంటున్నారా? కంగారుపడకండి! పైపైన చూస్తే గణనాథుని నవరాత్రులకి , ఆడవాళ్లకి ఏం అనుబంధం లేనట్లు అనిపిస్తుంది కాని... అసలు బొజ్జ గణపయ్య ఆవిర్భావానికే జగదంబ కారణం! అంటే... స్త్రీ అన్నమాట! లోకంలో అందరూ అమ్మ కడుపులోంచే పుడతారు. వినాయకుడు కూడా అమ్మ వల్లే పుట్టాడు. కాని, ఇక్కడ విశేషం ఏంటంటే, పార్వతీ తనయుడు పూర్తిగా అమ్మకూచే! నాన్న శివుడికి నలుగు పిండి నుంచి పుట్టిన ఈ కొడుకెవరో కూడా తెలియదు! అందుకే కదా... ద్వారం వద్ద అడ్డుపడ్డ విఘ్నేశుని తల నరికి... మళ్లీ గజాననునిగా చేస్తాడు!  జననం , తరువాత శివుని అడ్డగించటం, ఆ తరవాత గజాననుడుగా ఏనుగు ముఖం కలవాడవటం పక్కన పెడితే... గణపతి కథలో మరోసారి మనకు అమ్మ మనసు స్పష్టంగా కనిపిస్తుంది! వినాయకుడు విపరీతంగా కుడుములు తినేస్తే పొట్ట పెరిగిపోతుంది. దాంతో ఆయన తల్లిదండ్రుల కాళ్లకు కూడా నమస్కారం చేయలేకపోతాడు. అప్పుడే అతని పొట్టపై చంద్రుడి చూపు సోకి అది కాస్తా పగిలిపోతుంది! ఈ సారి కూడా తన కొడుకు గురించి పార్వతి తల్లడిల్లిపోతుంది! తండ్రి శివుడి కంటే ఎక్కువగా ఆమె అల్లాడిపోతుంది. ఆ బాధలోంచి కోపానికిలోనై చంద్రుని శపిస్తుంది కూడా! తల్లి మనస్సంటే అది! తల్లి పార్వతే కాదు విఘ్నరాజు జీవితంలో మనకు మరో ఇద్దరు స్త్రీలు కూడా కనిపిస్తారు. వాళ్లే సిద్ధి, బుద్ధి! ఈ ఇద్దరు గణనాథునికి భార్యలంటారు! సిద్ధి అంటే విజయం, బుద్ది అంటే తెలివి... ఈ రెండిటిని స్త్రీలుగా చూపటం ద్వారా మన పూర్వులు ఆడవాళ్ల ప్రాధాన్యత సూచించారు! ఎవరికైనా మానసికమైన శక్తి, విజయం కావాలంటే స్త్రీతోడు ఖచ్చితంగా వుండితీరాలనేదే ఇందులోని సూక్ష్మం! భార్యలు సిద్ది, బుద్ది అయితే.... మరి గణనాథుని కూతురు ఎవరు? ఆమె సంతోషి మాతా అంటారు ఉత్తరాది వారు! దీనికి పురాణ ప్రాశస్త్యం లేనప్పటికీ... భావం మాత్రం భలే సుందరంగా వుంటుంది! సంతోషాన్ని కూడా స్త్రీ మూర్తిగానే భారతీయ సంస్కృతి ఆరాధించింది! ఇంట్లో సంతోషం కలగాలంటే ఎవరు ముఖ్యమో చెప్పకనే చెప్పింది!వినాయక చవితికి, స్త్రీలకి వున్న సంబంధం అర్థమైంది కదా? శక్తి స్వరూపం అయిన పార్వతీ ఆయన తల్లి, సిద్ధి, బుద్ధి ఆయన భార్యలు, సంతోషమే ఆయన కూతురు! ఇలా విఘ్నాధిపతి జీవితం అంతా స్త్రీ శక్తులతోనే శోభిస్తు దర్శనమిస్తుంది మనకు! 

Best Ways To Make Long Distance Relationships Work       Distance means so little when someone means so much. But the distance could sometimes play a crucial role in making or breaking a relationship. There are plenty of reasons why most of the time long distance relationships never tend to workout for new couples. As a new couple, you go through a period when you want to see each other every second and that is almost impossible when you are miles away. There are many other such reasons which need to be addressed in order for the smooth sailing of the new relationship. It could be very frustrating for the newly weds as there is no intimacy at least between the meetings. You then tend to experience difficulties in connecting because you don’t have eye contact, and can’t take walks or enjoy dinners out together. Then again, the best part is that it makes the meetings so much more intense than they would be in a “normal” relationship. It’s the quality, not the quantity. With no face to face interaction, one can sometimes get frustrated very intensively. It is possible that this frustration then turns to conflicts between you as an outlet for it. This could lead to misunderstandings that are very difficult to resolve over a chat or a call or an e-mail.  So insert a day or two without any communication. What happens then is that you miss each other very intensely, and you usually find yourselves at a much higher level than you were before. Differing workloads and lifestyles can create a lot of conflicts between partners. Being aware of each other’s schedules and priorities helps in avoiding unrealistic expectations and hence, minimises conflicts. Also, writing is more intense than verbal communication and allows you to be more intimate. That will create a tighter bond between you. So jot down all your thoughts and moments which are special and share it once in a while to make it a special read. Trust is a key to a successful relationship especially a long distance one. You might come across tough situations where people would be talking different aspects of your life with the other partner. But make sure you trust each other and stay by them through thick and thin. It gets difficult to find time to talk to your partner due to busy schedules, and when he says he is too busy to chat, you need to trust him. It’s the same for him when you can’t find the time for a phone call. It becomes a test of patience as well as trust and if you survive, it makes you a better person and leaves you with a stronger relationship.  Do become more loyal in a long distance relationship. There may be an endless number of good looking people from the opposite gender asking for your number at various parties, but you miss your partner so often, proclaiming that you’re already happily ‘taken’ gives you comfort. Also stay away from being jealous. Jealousy is a very dangerous thing and can threaten every romantic relationship. Jealousy is commonly a lack of trust and understanding. It very often reveals insecurities and bad experiences in other relationships. Long distance relationships are quite different from the regular close relationships. They have a unique set of strengths and challenges. If you find that you are unable to maintain your relationship, or experience frequent conflicts despite your best efforts, working with a couples therapist might help you resolve conflicts and maintain your relationship.   ..Divya

  Diet Plan During Pregnancy     Pregnant women should avoid unhealthy diets like consuming junk food, processed food that is high on fat as well as sugar and industrial products. Researchers have examined the diets of 83 mothers during their pregnancy and found that their children are either suffering from behavioral problems or from hyperactivity issues due to the mothers’ unhealthy diets. Balanced diet and healthy choices made during pregnancy effects the mental health of the children in a positive way. Consumption of Processed food that has high sugar levels and high fat food is considered risky as it leads to early onset of ADHD Symptoms in children. ADHD is also known as Attention – Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder. It is a biological condition which affects the functioning of the brain.  It is most common in boys and might be caused due to the disruption that affects the neurotransmitter. So therefore it could be said that, healthy eating during pregnancy is important for the health of the children in future. Omega 3 fatty acids extracted from oily fish and the oils present in some vegetables can protect and develop the brains of the children.

     Don't let marriage effect your friendships     "True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it be lost." goes the saying...   Considering the valuable role friends play in our life it was deemed to fix a day which is dedicated to friends and friendship. Its true that friendship tastes good the longer we are in it. In India we all tend to maintain friendships to a greater extent . But due to various reasons married women and men wont get a chance to continue their friendships which are there before wedding the same way after their wedding too. The men bid good bye to their female friends and girls do the other way round.  Whatever the case may be, post marriage, friendships are viewed in a different light. You are not the same person who can attend calls at any hour of the day or slip out for a sip of coffee when your friend is down and out.     All because marriage is definitely a lifestyle change and a big responsibility all together. They will be so confused that they take long time to adjust to the new relations around. And it is not only married couples who try to adjust to the new environment, but even friends find it difficult to adjust to the new you. Dose that mean they should leave their friendships which were prior to marriage?? Will meeting your good old friend become a problem without a solution? The answer its No..If good care is taken every one can enjoy their freedom in managing the same friends post marriage too.   "First of all a partner needs to ensure that his/her friendship with the opposite sex isn't hampering their married life. They should meet in their partners' presence too often so as to build trust. And also, it should become a family get together rather than friends meeting friends. If not possible, such relationships should be left back in time," advises physiologists . Secondly  both partners must realize that they have had a different set of friends before marriage. And neither of the partners feels close to the other set of friends unless both of them actually make an effort to feel welcomed. If this is not dealt with on time, people usually end up losing close friends."   Thirdly friends should neither discuss nor come into your relationships, which might create a big gap between the husband and wife. Final point is ,even though friends are the best thing to happen to our lives, any day friendship should not weigh heavier than relationships, and one should know where to draw the line.   Don't get yourself in the position to say - 'Our friendship was great till it lasted!'   ..Divya

    పెళ్లయితే, ఆడ‌వారి స్నేహాలు ఆగిపోవ‌ల‌సిందేనా! (ఫ్రెండ్ షిప్ డే స్పెషల్)     స్నేహం విష‌యంలో మ‌గ‌వారి అదృష్ట‌మే ఎక్కువేమో! ఎప్పుడో చిన్న‌ప్పుడు బ‌డిలో చ‌దువుకున్న నేస్తాలు కూడా జీవితాంతం క‌లిసి ఉండే అవ‌కాశం ఉంటుంది. కానీ ఆడ‌వారి విష‌యం అలా కాదు. పెళ్లి త‌రువాతో, పిల్ల‌ల త‌రువాతో వారి వ్య‌క్తిగ‌త జీవితాల‌న్నీ భ‌ర్త‌కీ, పిల్ల‌ల‌కీ అంకితం అయిపోతుంటాయి. ఇక పుట్టింటిని వ‌దిలి భ‌ర్త‌తో పాటుగా ఊరు కూడా మారిపోతే చెప్ప‌నే అక్క‌ర్లేదు. దాంతో అటు మాన‌సికంగా, భౌతికంగా వారి నేస్తాలంద‌రికీ దూరం అయిపోతుంటారు. మ‌రి ఆ స్నేహాల‌ను నిలుపుకొనేందుకు మార్గ‌మే లేదా అంటే లేకేం!   ఒక రికార్డుని ఉంచుకోండి: మీ నేస్తాలంద‌రి పేర్ల‌నీ, వారి చిరునామాల‌నీ, ఫోన్ నెంబ‌ర్ల‌తో స‌హా ఒక చోట న‌మోదు చేసుకోండి. ఇవే కాకుండా వారి పుట్టిన రోజులూ, పెళ్లి రోజులూ రాసుకోండి. ఇలా మీ నేస్తాల జాబితా అంటూ ఉంటే... ఎప్ప‌టికైనా వారిని తిరిగి ప‌ల‌క‌రించే అవ‌కాశం ఉంటుంది. ఈ జాబితాని వీలైనంత పెంచుకునే ప్ర‌య‌త్నం చేయండి. వారిలో కొంద‌రితోనైనా మీ స్నేహాన్ని నిలుపుకొనే అవ‌కాశం ఉంటుంది క‌దా!   ప‌ల‌క‌రిస్తూ ఉండండి: జీవితంలో మ‌నం ఎంతో స‌మ‌యాన్ని వృథా చేస్తూ ఉంటాము. పైగా టీవీ, వార్తాప‌త్రిక‌లు, సినిమాలు... అంటూ ఎంతో స‌మ‌యాన్ని వెచ్చిస్తూ ఉంటాము. కానీ మ‌న‌కి ఇష్ట‌మైన చిన్న‌నాటి నేస్తాల‌ను ప‌ల‌క‌రించేందుకు బ‌ద్ధ‌కిస్తాము. దాంతో, కాలంతో పాటుగా విలువైన స్నేహాలు కూడా మ‌రుగున‌ప‌డిపోతుంటాయి. అందుకే వీలైన‌ప్పుడ‌ల్లా వారిని ఫోన్లో ప‌ల‌క‌రిస్తూ, వారి యోగ‌క్షేమాల‌ను క‌నుక్కొంటూ ఉండండి. వారి సంసారం ఎలా సాగుతోందో ప‌రామ‌ర్శించండి. వీలైతే వారి పుట్టిన‌రోజుల వంటి సంద‌ర్భాల‌లో మీ శుభాకాంక్ష‌ల‌ను తెలియ‌చేయండి.   అపార్థాలు వ‌ద్దు: పెళ్ల‌యిన త‌రువాత అంద‌రి ప‌రిస్థితీ ఒకేలా ఉండ‌క‌పోవ‌చ్చు. ఫోన్ చేసే విష‌యంలోనూ, మాట్లాడే విషయంలోనూ వారి తీరు మారిపోయి ఉండ‌వ‌చ్చు. అయితే అది కేవ‌లం వారిలో వ‌చ్చిన మార్పుగా భావించి అపార్థం చేసుకోవ‌ద్దు. వాళ్లు ఎలాంటి ప‌రిస్థితుల్లో ఉన్నారో అనుకుని ఊరుకోండి. మీ ప‌రామ‌ర్శ‌లు వారిని నిజంగానే ఇబ్బంది పెడుతున్నాయి అనుకుంటే వెన‌క్కి త‌గ్గండి.     గెట్ టు గెద‌ర్‌: మ‌గ‌వారు క‌లుసుకోవాలంటే బోలెడు అవ‌కాశాలు ఉంటాయి. కానీ ఇంటిప‌ట్లునే ఉండే గృహిణులు క‌లుసుకోవాలంటే ఏమంత సుల‌భం కాదు. అందుక‌ని వీలైతే ఆరునెల‌ల‌కో ఏడాదికో ఒక్క‌సారైనా మీ ఊళ్లో ఉండే చిన్న‌నాటి నేస్తాలంతా క‌లుసుకునేలా ఒకొక్క‌రి ఇంట్లో గెట్ టు గెద‌ర్ ఏర్పాటు అయ్యేందుకు చొర‌వ చూపండి.   అండ‌గా నిల‌బ‌డండి: అవ‌స‌ర‌మైన‌ప్పుడు అక్క‌ర‌కు రాని స్నేహం ఎందుకూ కొర‌గాద‌ని తెలిసిందే! అందుకే మీ నేస్తాలలో ఎవ‌రిక‌న్నా ఏద‌న్నా ఇబ్బంది త‌లెత్తిన‌ప్పుడు మీ వంతుగా మీరు ఏం చేయ‌గ‌ల‌రో ఆలోచించండి. డ‌బ్బు సాయం చేయ‌క‌పోవ‌చ్చు, హామీ ప‌త్రాల మీద సంత‌కాలు పెట్ట‌లేక‌పోవ‌చ్చు. కానీ వారు క‌ష్టాల‌ను ఓర్చుకోవ‌డానికి మీ తోడు ఉంటే చాలు. వారి క‌న్నీటిని తుడ‌వ‌డానికి మీ ఓదార్పు ఉంటే చాలు.   కుటుంబంతో పంచుకోండి: మీ నేస్తాల గురించీ, వారితో మీకు ఉన్న అనుబంధం గురించీ మీ కుటుంబంతో పంచుకోండి. మీ జీవితంలో స్నేహితుల‌కు కూడా త‌గినంత ప్రాధాన్య‌త ఇవ్వాల‌నుకున్న అభిలాష‌ని వారు గుర్తించేలా చేయండి. మీ స్నేహితుల‌ను క‌లుసుకునేందుకు వెళ్లేట‌ప్పుడు ఎప్పుడ‌న్నా మీ కుటుంబాన్నో, లేదంటే క‌నీసం మీ పిల్ల‌ల‌నో వెంట తీసుకుని వెళ్లండి. వాళ్ల‌కి కూడా మీ స్నేహితుల అభిమానాన్ని అందించండి.     - నిర్జ‌ర‌.

Ways to Deal With Husband's Retirement   Retirement of spouse would obviously mean more time for each other, but with it comes in a lot of lifestyle changes too, that one needs to adapt for a better relationship. When couples first marry or have a child, the transition can be a bit bumpy. But once you adjust to your new routine, you often end up happier than you were before. The same goes for couples in retirement. The first months are often fraught with conflict. But later it will turn out to be as beautiful as ever. Be prepared for staying home together. After years of spending mostly nights and weekends with your spouse, seeing him or her all day every day can be stressful. "If they are both retiring at the same time, they are faced with perhaps having to be in each other's faces, especially couples who have had a history of marital conflict. One of the major issues a woman go through is to manage her husband's boredom. Once the spouse retires she will soon discover just how uncreative he can be about filling up his day. Women say that when their husbands retire, they sometimes turn to them to be their playmate. In many marriages, the wife is the social arranger, so to some extent, it makes sense. But if the wife is still working, this turns into a problem.   Women should also not feel guilty when going out with their set of friends once they realize the spouse would be left at home alone. Sure, he's been staying around the house all week. But that doesn't mean you should drop your get together, quit meeting your best friend for dinner, and going out with your friends without him. Keep it, for no other reason than your own mental health. Couples need to rework their old routines. They have not been together much during the day, and so they have to renegotiate how much closeness or separateness they want in their activities. Stop feeling guilty when you suggest that he start preparing dinners, pick up the clothes at the cleaners, or fold the laundry. You aren't trying to demean him, but he now likely has more free time than you do. This isn't a bad conversation to have before he retires.   Also retiring to your home from a job where you felt important or needed, and where your opinion mattered, can make you feel your skills are no longer apt. So look for some work which interests you and in which you have some knowledge which will keep you occupied and also gives you reassurance. Nearly half of both men and women say they are in agreement with their spouse or partner about saving for retirement. But always make sure you talk it out, the money matters post retirement could be something which also could be discussed well in advance and also sorted out once the retirement happens for real. - Divya

    7 Ways to be Better Work From Home Moms!     It seems to be a blessing in disguise to have the opportunity to work from home for a woman. As, it saves time, in travelling, in getting ready for work and also the fatigue related to it. But the downside to it is there might be a lot of distraction associated with working from home and also the fact that you might sometimes not feel the drive to work with surroundings so eased out, compared to staying up at office to work as you get to see people working along with you. So we thought we could get you some brilliant ways to work better from home andkeep the productivity levels high.   Keep Your Workspace and Personal Space Separate: Blending your workspace with your personal space is not a good way to stay productive. Sure, the idea of watching TV while working is great if you have some downtime but it actually decreases your productivity tremendously. And, when these two worlds start to blend into one it can be difficult to allocate time to one or the other.   Stay away from Distractions: No one can ever completely eliminate distractions either in an office or at home. But you can reduce them by knowing what distracts you and taking action to avoid it. In an office, it might be getting pulled into unnecessary meetings or chatty co-workers things not necessarily in our control. At home, you may have  more control over distractions family members or tasks around the house.   Mark out your working space:  Let your physical space help you boost your productivity. If you need to avoid distractions and multitask appropriately, then be sure you home office helps you with that by reducing temptations. A space with a door that can be closed signals to others when you do not wish to be disturbed. Figuring out your priorities, weaknesses and strengths is the key to creating a space that works for you.   Make a schedule and follow it without fail:  Leaving the office is often a clear a signal that your work day has ended. When you work at home, the signal isn't always quite as clear. When home and work are in the same place, it is especially important to manage your time well by setting your specific work hours. Perhaps you can set an ongoing regular schedule, or maybe you need to take a look at the calendar each week and determine when you will work. Invest in comfortable ergonomic Furniture:  You might get up a few times for a break, but you may find yourself sitting down at your desk for hours on end once you get into a groove. That’s why it’s important to invest in ergonomic furniture for your office. You can’t afford to have your productivity and health hindered by a poor workspace.   Answer phone calls and e-mails in batches:  There are few things more distracting than answering your phone in the middle of the project. After hanging up, your concentration is shot and you have to start all over again. To combat this, its recommended that you take the calls when you are ready to return them all in one session. The same goes for e-mail.   Let people around, including your children know your work schedule:  Set some ground rules for both yourself  and for everyone else in the household. Children especially need clear boundaries for behavior while you are working. However, your spouse or other adults in your life may need them as well. This might include your co-workers who may believe that because you work at home you are available 24/7.   ...Divya

    What to do when you dislike your spouse's friends!     With marriage comes lot of responsibilities and also various types of relationships that you need to deal with too. One such relationship to deal with is your spouse's friends. According to a recent survey a quarter of women dislike their partner's friends. A study suggests that one in four women hates their partner's friends because they are a bad influence. Some even believe they influence their better halves to drink, smoke and act differently. One in ten said their partner's friends had put a strain on their relationship.   The survey also found that one in twenty women dislikes one particular person in their partner's friendship group while a hard to please 75 per cent admitted not liking the majority of them. It also came to light that one in ten women dislikes one of their partner's friends so much they have forbidden their boyfriend, fiancé or husband from seeing them. Though surprisingly most women don't mind their other half spending time with his pals during special events, such as birthdays, Christmas and big sporting events.   Even if you have good intentions, telling your partner outright that you don’t like his or her friends isn’t the most appealing option and probably won’t get the best reaction. After all, most people feel that their friends are an extension and reflection of who they are, and your partner may feel personally attacked, irritated and insulted when you question his or her judgment and taste. So for this we bring to you some ways to lessen the pain when your significant other has friends you find to be significantly painful to be around.   The next time you’re going to spend time with these annoying acquaintances, invite some of your own buddies to join. In fact, there’s no reason why you have to spend time with your respective groups of friends on separate occasions. Or alternatively you could take a time out or a break and walk way for a while from the party or the get together. There is no need to always stick to your better half at all times, give yourself some space, thereby reducing the prospect of people annoying you.   Always remember that at the end of the day, you’re in a relationship with your partner and not your partner’s friends. You’re not always going to like everyone. You don’t let these people disrupt or ruin your life, nor do you let them influence the connections you have with others. So don’t let your partner’s group of friends impact your relationship. You’re bigger than that. Besides, there is always a possibility that your partner may also dislike your friends too, so give yourself and your partner that space to have a wonderful relationship.   ...Divya

ఇంగ్లండ్‌ ప్రధాని థెరెసా- ఎందుకంత ప్రత్యేకం!   ఐరోపా సమాఖ్య నుంచి ఇంగ్లండ్‌ తప్పుకోనుందని తెలియగానే ప్రపంచం విస్తుబోయింది. మిగతా దేశాలను కాదని తమ కాళ్ల మీదే తాము నిలబడాలనుకున్న ఇంగ్లండ్‌వాసుల నిర్ణయాన్ని వెక్కిరించింది. కానీ ఇంగ్లండు దేశ ప్రజలు మాత్రం, ఇది తమ సత్తాను చాటుకునే సందర్భంగా భావిస్తున్నారు. ఓ కొత్త ప్రధాని వారి ఆశలకు అండగా నిలుస్తున్నారు. ఆమే థెరెసా మే! సంక్షోభ సమయంలో ఎవరో ఒకరిని ప్రధానిగా ఎన్నుకోవాలి కాబట్టి థెరెసాను నిలబెట్టారనుకుంటే తప్పులో కాలేసినట్లే! ఆమె జీవితాన్ని తరచి చూసిని వారెవరికైనా ఆమె ఆషామాషీ మనిషి కాదని ఇట్టే అర్థమైపోతుంది. పనిమనుషుల కుటుంబం! థెరెసా చాలా సాధారణ కుటుంబ నేపథ్యం నుంచి వచ్చారు. ఆమె అమ్మమ్మ, నానమ్మ ఇద్దరూ కూడా ఇళ్లలో పనివారుగా జీవనాన్ని సాగించేవారట. థెరెసా తండ్రి చర్చిలో చిరుద్యోగిగా పనిచస్తూ అంచెలంచెలుగా ఓ ఉన్నతాధికారిగా మారాడు. కుటుంబ పరిస్థితులు ఎలా సాగుతున్నా, థెరెసా మాత్రం చదువులో ఒకో అడుగే వేసుకుంటూ పోయారు. 1977 నాటికి ఆక్స్‌ఫర్డ్‌ విశ్వవిద్యాలయంలో డిగ్రీ పట్టాను చేజిక్కించుకున్నారు. తల్లిదండ్రులు దూరం చదువు పూర్తయిన వెంటనే థెరెసా బ్యాంకింగ్ రంగంలో స్థిరపడ్డారు. జీవితం ఇప్పుడిప్పుడే గాడిన పడుతోందనుకునే సమయంలో మరో విషాదం ఆమెను వెన్నంటింది. 1981లో థెరెసా తండ్రి ఓ కారు ప్రమాదంలో తీవ్రంగా గాయపడి మరణించారు. ఇది జరిగిన మరి కొద్ది రోజులకే ఆమె తల్లి నాడీసంబంధ వ్యాధితో (multiple sclerosis) కన్నుమూసింది. ఆ సమయంలో తీవ్రమైన డిప్రెషన్‌లోకి చేరుకున్న థెరెసాకు ఆమె భర్త ఫిలిప్‌ అండగా నిలిచాడు.   సంతానం లేదు! థెరెసా ఆక్స్‌ఫర్డ్‌ విశ్వవిద్యాలయంలో చదువుకునే రోజుల్లో ఆమెకు ఫిలిప్‌తో పరిచయం ఏర్పడింది. ఈ పరిచయానికి కారణం పాకిస్తాన్‌ నేత బెనజీర్‌ భుట్టోయే అంటారు. క్రమేపీ ఈ పరిచయం ప్రేమగా మారింది. ఆ ప్రేమ, వివాహానికి (1980) దారితీసింది. థెరెసాకంటే ఫిలిప్ రెండేళ్లు చిన్నవాడు. ఆ దూరం వారిద్దరినీ బాధించలేదు కానీ... వారిద్దరికీ మధ్య సంతానం కలిగే అవకాశం లేదని తేలడమే ఆ దంపతులను బాధించేది. ‘ఇతరుల కుటుంబాలను చూసినప్పుడు, మా దగ్గర లేనిదేదో వారికి దక్కిందని అర్థమవుతూ ఉంటుంది’ అంటూ ఒక ఇంటర్వ్యూలో పేర్కొన్నారు థెరెసా. కానీ ఆ దుఃఖాన్ని తన మనసులోనే దాచుకుని జీవితంలో సాగిపోయారు. టైప్‌ I డయాబెటిస్ గత నాలుగు సంవత్సరాలుగా టైప్‌ I డయాబెటిస్‌తో బాధపడుతున్నారు. డయాబెటిక్‌ రోగులలో ఈ తరహా వ్యాధి కేవలం 5-10 శాతం మందిలో మాత్రమే కనిపిస్తుంది. ఈ వ్యాధి ఉన్నవారు నిరంతరం తమ శరీరంలోని చక్కెర నిల్వలను పరీక్షించుకోవలసి ఉంటుంది. పైగా వారి శరీరంలో ఇన్సులిన్‌ ఉత్పత్తి తగినంతగా జరగదు కనుక, జీవితాంతమూ ఇంజక్షన్ల ద్వారా ఇన్సులిన్‌ను తీసుకోవలని ఉంటుంది. ఇదెంతటి బాధాకరమైన పరిస్థితో అర్థం చేసుకోవచ్చు. అయితేనేం! సాధారణ కుటుంబ నేపథ్యం, యుక్తవయసులో తల్లదండ్రులు దూరం, సంతానం లేదు, నయం కాని చక్కెర వ్యాధి, తనకంటే చిన్నవాడైన భర్త... చాలామంది ‘కష్టం’ అనుకునే విషయాలనే ఇవన్నీ! కానీ మొదటి నుంచీ రాజకీయాలలో చురుగ్గా ఉన్న థెరెసాను ఈ ఇబ్బందులేవీ అడ్డుకోలేదు. ఆమె సంకల్పాన్ని ఇవి ఏరకంగానూ నీరుగార్చలేదు. అసలు ఇవి కష్టాలే కాదన్నట్లుగా ఆమె ముందుకు సాగిపోయారు. సుదీర్ఘ కాలం కన్జర్వేటివ్‌ పార్టీతో అనుబంధం ఉన్న థెరెసాను, 2010లో బ్రిటన్‌ హోం శాఖ కార్యదర్శిగా నియమించారు. ఆ సమయంలో థెరెసా చూపించిన తెగువ అసాధారణం. ఉగ్రవాదం, గృహహింస, మత్తుపదార్థాలు... ఇలా ఒకటేమిటి! థెరెసా అన్ని సమస్యలనూ ఒక దారికి తెచ్చారు. మన దేశంలో కొందరు, ప్రమాదకారిగా అనుమానిస్తున్న జకీర్‌ నాయక్‌ను తమ దేశంలోకి అడుగు పెట్టనీయకుండా 2010లోనే నిషేధాన్ని విధించారు. అందుకే మాజీ ఇంగ్లండ్‌ ప్రధాని మార్గరెట్‌ థాచర్‌కు ఏమాత్రం తీసిపోని ఉక్కుమహిళగా ప్రపంచం థెరెసాను కీర్తిస్తోంది. ఇక కష్టాలు ఆమెను చూసి తలవంచక ఏం చేస్తాయి! - నిర్జర.