Why should we cook to please
Why should we cook to please ?
Ladies are expected to be good cooks...alright , alright..! I understand, they cook so well that you get impressed...but what about others who maynot be able to cook exactly the same way you expect them to cook..they may have been trained differently, or their cultural roots have different taste preferences that dont match with yours, or they never had an oppurtunity to cook or any need to learn and cook on their own. Why should one judge the other's cooking abilities ? Men dont get evaluated for their cooking skills...however, those Men who are excellent cooks are famous, among friends, relatives, and some at a competitive level.
When women start to judge, they become so fussy..it is no ones business to comment on someone else's abilities, whatever field it be. Others may possess better skills than you in some discipline, and you may fail miserably when compared to them..but, we dont want to keep quiet...comment, comment and comment until the other person realises and feels so helpless and unworthy. Everyone starts at Level 0.. No one is an expert in the first step. When two people meet, it is obvious that they either gossip about others, praise themselves or argue, very rarely, they talk about good things that dont involve negative emotions or others..there are very few people who dont touch others' personal matters and who get offended when others try to meddle with their emotions or personal topics.
Such a discussion tampers ones self esteem, motivation and encouragement.. They tend to feel demotivated, hurt and maynot want to meet others due to the fear of the same insult being repeated. Cooking, especially makes a good cook famous and a bad cook so disappointed. It is the character of the person that is important. If a person doesnot sit and brag about his/her own traits, then it is a harmless, selfless person...if somewhere ornthe other, one brags about her cooking skills or something good about her, then she either wants others to praise her always or she is a dominating personality who is ready to trample others around whenever a chance comes.
This is the same situation between Mother-in-laws and the Daughter-in-laws..mostly the latter group are targeted for their lack of cooking skills..is it mandatory to be trained in cooking to get married, or is it a gentle, good looking girl that thet seek ?! They say, days have changed, Men are friendlier with wives in these modern day life..but there are still quite some Men who compare their Mom's excellent cooking skills to the newly wed wife's rookie skills...between some couples, this torture continues for years. I wonder who made this statement 'the way to a man's heart is through his stomach..feed him well, and he is yours forever...this might be yester years' dream but it is the character of a man..if he is crooked, then even though you feed him well, he will comment on your cooking skills still.
Comparing ones cooking skills need not be important when friends meet...the other person maynot have been keeping healthy, or had an emotional problem that day...that she couldnot cook to impress..how much you write, how much you try to educate others...this cooking comparison game has been there in the families, among acquaintances, at work places, ...everywhere. Pride is so bad. When two praise each other in private, it is better..rather than praise eachother while the third person is around, may trigger issues and you will but loose good friends, the so-called good cooks !!
..Prathyusha