Comparison Can Be Harmful

parenting happens in real time, on the spot, and in the moment. However we discuss on the parenting patterns, its only a practical experience and need to be lived by every parent individually. When, we are recognizing those moments of parenting, when your actions and reactions can help your child learn and grow in the best possible ways and so as for parents. When you become a parent for the second time, you would impose your earlier expertise and experience with the second child as well. But, point to be remembered here is every child is unique and parents should understand this basic thing and act accordingly.

Be very careful when parenting two kids. Don't compare and never label them. Babies develop so rapidly that one set of abilities is bound to develop faster than another," say experts. So never expect your child to be like the neighbour's. That will put pressure on you and you will miss the original beauty of your child while growing.

Among siblings, comparisons can lead to labels. "Our little scholar," you might say of your book-obsessed toddler, or "our wild child," of his energetic sibling. Even labels meant to praise your children's differing abilities can be problematic. Siblings sometimes feel that if one brother "owns" the athlete label, the other brother isn't even going to try, for fear of falling short. And that "picky eater" label may fuel the very behavior you'd like to discourage. Sure, there'll be times when you'll find yourself describing your child's likes and dislikes. But when you do so, "reframe" your words, say experts. Try to use words like energetic instead of using "wild", and , "spirited" instead of "hyper", and "careful" in the place of "shy", the add.

Comparison can kill the natural skill in children; while striving to bring both on the same ground, parents also will miss the actual talents which every child brings along.So, watch your words and actions keenly before you act.Happy parenting!!

- Bhavana