Power struggle between parents   New Mom or Old Mom...you like to have control of the situation as you know your child better than Dad. Sometimes, we don't need Dad's help atall and it feels so irritating when he tries to force his help or expertise in Childcare.  This power struggle happens more between new parents, both Mom and Dad are new to the Child. Dad feels Mom doesnot know much about childcare as she is a first time Mom and he tries to give inputs and forces to help her. Though its her first time, she is a Mom by instinct, it comes naturally to her. She had practiced baby care right from the first months of inception, she had read multiple articles, spoken to experts like her Grandma and Mom, friends and others, asked numerous questions to the Doc...atleast she knows more than Dad. Its good to have a helping hand but only when she asks for it, definitely not when she doesnot need it.  The triggering moments are-- He jumps in when you are putting the baby to sleep and he or she doesnot sleep easily. The baby's mood  changes and starts indicating to Dad to come and play. That is 100% a wrong time, now Mom's effort is totally wasted.  When the baby cries in sleep, he/she falls and gets hurt, when the nurse give the baby an injection...these are the times when the baby wants to see Mom's face, but Dad jumps in, and the baby cries more. He feels bad when Mom tries to show up....i have personally seen these situations...and believe me, things will ease as days go by. The child's actions will slowly express to Dad that he/she likes seeing Mom when sad or in pain, and why not, he still seeks His Mom's advice.  To ease the issue: Don't take it too emotionally, unless the child comes to you, let Dad comfort the child sometimes, when its not a badly hurt situation.  You take a back seat. Let him also cherish those moments of cuddling with the baby. Don't jump in if he has already picked the baby up and the child is getting some relief. Sometimes the child forces his or her way out of Dad's arms to come to you, in that case, pacify the child  and explain to the child that going to Dad is not  wrong and that Dad is trying to help the baby. Atleast Dad will know that you are not power playing.     

Host the party well! Every season is a party season, and with Birthdays around, its always a busy time. For the invitees, its busy time shopping for gifts and for the hosts, it is a big time from the beginning. Do it well! Specially if you have been dreaming big about this party, you need a good plan, good scheduling, better ideas, and a nice process to keep up with your social contacts. Hosting party is not a one time story, its a ripple effect, if you host well, people will talk good about you, if you mess up, they might be silent but it speaks alot.  Start with the dream: if a party is coming close, start dreaming about how you want to do it. Begin 3-4 months ahead of time. Even those 3-4 months might not be enof...make a list of the thoughts that strike your mind when you think of this party. Let them be the wierdest, dont worry, chalk them out. You can delete and modify those ideas later. Write whom you want to invite, how you want to decorate, if you want to do it on your won or hire someone, where and when you want to host.  Think of handy prep help: The best of the decorations sometimes come from a cousin or a friend, the most delicious cake can be from an Aunt, your Uncle may be able to help you host a musical night. Think of all the handy help from among the friends and relatives. If not, think of helping the most needy talents and motivate them.  Compare positively: Talk to your friends about the parties they attended, and the themes they came across, you may not repeat it but modify it. Bring new themes that are combinations of traditional and modern themes.  Get some help: Take help of a reliable person who has similar ideas, someone who can decorate the same way as you dreamt and planned incase you are busy at the last moment. You may be nervous or tired, and so you need someone to fill in your shoes with the decision making and delegating. Discuss all your ideas and plans, share the contact details of all the people who are involved in your party preparation with your friend or cousin who is assisting you closely.  Things will be easy this way,,,,have fun in your own party.

Spray painting indoors   Some art project, a repair work, home renovation or today's pass time, and you are ready to aim that nozzle of a spray paint can. Wait there!! Don't start off right away. Do you have outdoor space or a lawn? If not, Did you open the windows of the room atleast? Did you cover the floor with a plastic sheet? One has to answer Yes to atleast of of these questions and only then proceed to the next step in the spray painting job.  If you don't have a lawn or balcony and have carpet or a floor thats not well covered with plastic sheet, to protect the floor from being sprayed on, then you might have to get ready to clean up your floor expensively later. That nozzle is going to mist away the paint on your walls and floor soon. Use a plastic sheet and with a tape stick it to the edges of the floor and don't use a newspaper as paper might absorb the paint and soak in it or  fly away when the wind blows. If you have already covered the floor, then keep the window open to  get some fresh air.    Like most paints, it might contain VOCs, gases that can irritate your lungs. Use a mask or cover your nose with a scarf. Keep a floor fan On to direct air outside and let the window be open until the paint is completely dry. The more ventilation you have, the quicker any harmful gases will clear out. And try to find a paint with low VOC to limit your exposure to harmful gases.

How to dispose re- used Oil  Most of us love deep fried foods, as they are usually tasty, keeping aside the oily part of it. Some of us are more health conscious hence, they don't prefer deep frying at home, but once in a while, even the most healthy people are forced to make deep fried foods at home when entertaining guests or prepping up for a festival or a grand occasion. After the cooking part is done, here comes the actual part, what should one do with the remaining oil, reusing it might not be a healthier option. But it can be used just once for tempering purposes only, definitely not  again for deep frying, which most of us tend to do. The oil has already reached its boiling point and lost its quality and using it to deep fry again will only cause bad cholesterol issues. Hence, cool the oil, move it into an Air-tight container and store in a cool, dark place, reuse as early as possible for strictly tempering purpose.   If you decide not to reuse the oil at all, then don't pour it down the drain, as I  did before I knew or gave it a smarter thought. Cooking grease can only destroy the drain pipes. We might think "Its just oil and it will freely flow down the drain", but that does not happen always. Oil, butter, meat drippings, and other forms of fat can build up inside your home's sewage line, eventually clogging it completely. Even if you don't have to replace the pipes, the plumber will charge you more to clean the stuff. Even worse it could clog the public sewer line. To avoid such a gross mess, let the grease cool in the pan, then pour it into an empty used can/bottle and throw it  in the regular garbage. Or just wipe up the cooled grease with paper towels and toss them but that is if you have little oil in the pan and save your drains from clogging.

No Driving force!   Days of super speed has arrived long back, everyone is running busily around through the day. In countries like India, where there is wide facility of public transport, someone who has not learnt to drive a vehicle, who can't afford an own vehicle, who can't drive due to health and other personal reasons can survive easily...however, even in India, having a personal vehicle and being able to drive on own pays well in times of urgency.... Once we cross the country and reach Western countries like USA, where not every state has public transport, survival becomes difficult, dependency increases. Who thought getting married will force a woman to stay between the four walls, leaving behind her busy career, family and friends, other activities in India? Until the husband teaches her to drive left-handed, she is left always at home. I am not discussing much about the Work permit Visa issues, but they make it worse. Students who finish their Masters in USA learn to drive on their own, but life is definitely different for a woman from India who gets married to someone abroad. It happens with anyone coming to a new country on a dependent visa, and no driving permit.  Unlike India, not  every city is busy, with people seen everywhere. Until, one makes friends, gets busy in life, she has to cut the boring time...Its a new place, one side is the anxiety and worry that she left all her own people so far...the other side is the exciting feeling of getting to know new people, new culture, new places..there is lot of chance and time to go around and visit while the husband is at work, but all that stops her is the inability to drive...even though she drove a 4-wheeler in India, in America its left-handed driving, she still needs practice and a driving permit. Another angle is the hesitation whether to ask the husband to teach her to drive, or ask to take her out as she is feeling home-sick and wants to be as busy as possible inorder to forget the memories of her family back in India. The husband might be busy, too tired, or he might feel she is not allowing him to get rest...all these thoughts and feelings may not happen to every woman, but most of us encounter these..... There are so many eyes looking for good friends...so much disappointment, but all i could say is...wait, give it some time, if he can't take you out, you make the habit of going for a walk, during winter, go out when sunny..or go to the fitness center, every apartment community has one, look for other Indians to make friends, but look for like-mindedness. If you life crafts or cooking, learn new stuff, internet provides every coaching, even new technologies if you are a techie, bring a plant home, do some gardening, decorate your home....these are just passing clouds, slowly take a friend's or your husband's help to learn driving. After a year of so, when you turn around, you will laugh at these times, and sigh saying "Gone are those leisure days, i had so much of time in hand". Cheer up!!

Think Before you talk!   God gave us a mouth to speak, but not just a mouth to talk , talk and talk...He gave us a mind to think and ears to hear. That probably means, we should think before we speak, and listen to what the other person has to say. Its not always a TV, Radio show to talk one-way...even the Presenters in those channels prepare before they talk and only talk sense, and to talk one-way is their kinda job. Why am i discussing so much about 'Sensible Talking'?  Most of us are busy or occupied with some job or chore through the day, at any given time. Some  have time to talk, gab--sense or nonsense. Just because someone gave you an appointment to meet, doesnot mean they have the whole time in the world to listen to you. and that's why its an appointment, finish your job and leave them alone.  It can be a Doctor's office, you might know him/her for years. Doesnot make sense if you discuss all your family matters and chat with the Doc while other patients are anxiously waiting to get a cure from him/her. It can be at a Medical Store, where you are chatting with the Pharmacist and others are waiting. Even at any office, people might look  they have leisure time, but you never know unless you ask..some might even hesitate to tell you that they don't have much time for you, in that case, finish your job and say 'Bye', they will be happy to meet you again.

New Moms and their Feelings Being a Mom, I know encounters all the different mixed feelings one comes across in this journey called motherhood. The day we hear the news, its a brand new feeling. As the 9 months journey begins, its a unique experience, Every mom has her own special story about pregnancy. And if, due to unforeseen circumstances, she faces a miscarriage, thats another shock...it takes long to heal and become normal, even with a tiny 4-5 weeks baby, She might overcome it, but the very pain is recalled often. Not easy to forget the accident totally. The time when she is in labor, is another anxiety. One excitement of being able to see the baby's face in the next few minutes, where the 9 month journey seems so worth it. But if there arises any complication during delivery, she undergoes trauma, despair that fear which none can explain...Finally the baby's arrival brings tears, even though she is utterly tired, and her body cut if its a C-Section, she smiles at the sound of her child's cry. Everyday of the baby's childhood is a new experience. She feels proud when her plan works out, and sees failure when simple things don't turn out the way she expected. It can be the simplest thing, her child not sleeping on time, as she planned, if the child does not eat the food she prepared with lots of care, if the child says "NO, STOP, SHUT UP" learning things by observing, Mom's heart is broken one more time. Every time, Dad shouts on the child to discipline, Mom knows he is not serious, still she is hurt. If anyone comments on the child's behaviour, she is there to defend but straightens the child in private. When they grow up, the first day of school is yet another test for Mom. And when they leave home to study further, its a saga of tears. On and on......Mom, your love for your child can never dry up, like the tears of love in your eyes!!!

Take time out for yourself Soon as Mommy knows she is expecting a child--if planned, her immediate response will be so very exciting and extremely happy. Even with the slightest inconvenience, at times, pregnancy feels awkward, Mommy might say "am i there yet? Let the Baby come sooner, i can't handle this weight anymore!", still she is all excited to see the face of her little miracle and waits eagerly.    The first months are so tiresome, yet everytime she looks at the child's face, she forgets about all the sleepless nights, worrisome moments and feels "she was born to be his/her Mommy". Once the child starts to crawl, life gets a little busier. Baby proofing the house, keeping an eye on the child every moment is tough. Those sleepless nights and tiresome days continue. Yet, your house is under your control.  But,as they grow up, keeping them busy through the day, tackling the worry of entertaining the child without letting him/her feel bored of staying within walls is yet another busy job. Once they go to school, their schedules keep your on your toes...you might rethink--"well, should i have waited some more years for kids" or "Should we have taken a back seat after just one child?" Mommy--you are tired. Let loose, don't worry too much about keeping your house spotless clean with such busy timetables forces the little left-out energy. At times, its important to not over-do. Take someones help, or appoint a maid, or...just  keep things aside, even making phone calls to maids and arranging a cleaning appointment is yet another task for you. One weekend of relaxation is nothing wrong. Don't feel guilty if you haven't cleaned your kitchen one day as you do every night, if you haven't called someone who expects your call everyday, if you haven't escaped reading your favorite book to attend an obligation-party.  You need to recharge your mind and body for the coming years. Well, not to frighten or warn you. Thinking positively, the future days will be happier,  and you have to get ready for them by recharging and energizing yourself.

 Matty Place   Inviting someone to dice with us is one way to win friends. Old or new, our dining tables are the place to make new and strengthen relationships...Not just the food, but if the decor in your dining room matches your food taste, it is so very inviting.  Here are some ideas for the placemats found in the market these days. The regular plastic, vinyl placemats with different designs and write-ups are still around as usual.    Bring a splash of  color and richness with your dinner parties. These bright placemats add color and amazing shimmer with intricately sewn glass beads and zari work. Similarly bright glasses and dinnerware match their extravaganza.  Natural materials are making their way into everything. Bamboo, jute, coconut wire, water hyacinth etc create a delicate and airy look. Add simple dinnerware and bright napkins for a showy tabletop display. Plain glassware is better.  Dhurrie has been coming and going onto our dining tables from years. Naturally, hand-woven dhurrie placemats weigh light to the touch, go well with the shades of spices. They are so simple and make our decoration efforts easy. Simple stainless steel dinner ware best with these.

 Kitchen Storage   Most of us have small kitchens, large kitchens, cozy kitchens etc..we basically categorize and name them so based on the amount of storage they offer. Here are some tips to organize any kitchen effectively. A few ideas on what kind of shelves to choose and 5 essential items will help you know whats where in your kitchen storage and make your search and cook time easy. 1.Use tall clear square storage containers for maximum efficiency as they take up less space horizontally. 2.Manage baking pans in a simple dish rack. 3.Use large non-transparent baskets to store products such as kid's treats and baking supplies. These baskets hide the treats so that your kids will not drag you to the pantry and dig into it always. Baking supplies have sugar, icing creams, and they need to be camouflaged too. Make sure to label all these baskets and containers. 4.Elevate rows of canned goods on shelf risers for better visibility. 5.A lazy Susan (rotating tray) brings items in the back of the cabinet to the front with just a quick spin which means no more digging to the back of the shelf. With sliding shelves, you can see items at the back of the shelf as easily as dry goods at the front. A deep drawer becomes a safe harbor for dishware when you add shaped posts or dowels to store bowls, plates separately. Add a rack inside the door for spices  

His People!     "His People" may be strange, rude, different and odd...why should the newly married Young lady worry about His people. No matter how they are, just leave that worry aside and accept them. He may feel "Your people" are odd and different. He is used to being around his family, their behaviours, their responses may not look odd to him, infact your family is also new to him, their words, their behaviour might look strange to him.   Everytime, You face an odd situation, imagine your spouse in the same place and behave the way he would have responded, but only and always positively. Never repay bad for bad. Your parents' respect is in your hands. If you are rude to them, because they don't know you well, they will immediately think  or even say "Have your parents taught you this?" or "Did your parents not correct your behaviour?" Don't force things to go so far. If they are simple matters, let go of  them, simply. As days go by, you will realize they were petty things, and your husband and his family will know how kind- hearted and soft spoken you are. There are not "Just first impressions" in a marriage, one has to put a continuous effort to make good impressions. Don't compare, if your husband or his side of the family ddn't treat you well, unintentionally or in certain hardships, you don't have to behave the same when your turn comes. Try to be a kind and best person always. Not so easy to control your frustrations, but it is definitely rewarding. One last word, i am definitely not asking you to be good if there is physical abuse!!

Making cleaning easy! Cleaning a bathroom is a very boring job, almost everyone wants to escape it. Here are some tips to make this job easy. Before starting to clean the bathroom, cover your hands with disposable gloves and cover your nose with a mask or towel. Unless you are using vinegar and baking soda, other disinfectant cleaners are harsh on nose. Mirror: Easy to clean soon after someone takes a bath, if you have time. Before going to bath, don't run the exhaust fan, the hot water leaves vapor on the mirror, spray a disinfectant also. Wipe off the tooth paste, hair spray smears easily with a newspaper/ paper towel. Use strokes in a single direction, to leave no wipe marks. Showerhead: Twice a month, scrub the spout with a rough brush, an all-purpose cleaner and wipe with a sponge. Every three months, pour enough white vinegar in a plastic bag to cover the shower head with a rubberband, tightly. Let it soak for a few hours, then remove the bag and scrub the nozzle with a brush, run the water to clear any absorbed vinegar. Shower curtain: Easy to clean after a shower. Cleaning it twice a month makes your job easier. Spray a bleach cleaner, work from top down with a rough brush and rinse the residue away. Tub and Tiles: Rub baking soda on the grout using a rough brush, the grout clears easily.Tub is easy to clean after someone takes a shower or bath, as the surface is wet and its easy to loosen dirt. Sink: Spray a disinfectant cleaner on the sink knobs, faucet base, basin and countertops. After 10mins of leaving it, wipe away the spray with a sponge. Use a not-so-smooth brush or an old tooth brush to scrub around the drain and the faucet base. Toilet: Using a disinfectant cleaner serves better. Toilet Brush: After cleaning the toilet and once you flush it clean, pour a generous amount of disinfectant in the toilet bowl, submerge the brush in the cleaner, give it a hard shake and then remove it to dry on a thick paper laid on the floor. Waste Bin: Using a small garbage/plastic bag as a layer helps clear the stuff when full, easily. Once a month, spray disinfectant spray in the bin, wash it and leave it under sun to dry. Ventilation fan: Four times a year, turn off the circuit for the bathroom. Remove the cover of the fan and rinse it with warm water and some dish soap. let dry before replacing the cover. Vaccum the fan blades. Unscrew any bulbs in the bathroom and wipe them with microfiber cloth. Floor: Do it after you have cleaned everything else. If your bathroom has a separate wet-dry area, first sweep the hair and dirt with a vaccum or broom and then spray all-purpose cleaner on the floor and mop it with hot-water, scrubbing it thoroughly.

Correcting Crafting Mistakes     For people who love to do craft/paint work, here are some reminders to help you escape the common mistakes one might end up falling into.  Don't paint directly from a paint can: Keeping the lid of a whole paint can can dry the paint quickly, if the brush is not in proper condition, the brush might spoil the whole paint. Hence, pour some paint into a tray and use it.  Remember to Close the cap of the glue bottle, everytime you open it. An open or loosely closed cap may dry out the glue or force it out of the bottle and your other items might be glued and spoiled.  Never cut  a fabric with rough estimation or imagination: If you are sewing something (curtain/pillow cover/ sofa cover), drape it on the item, take clear estimation/markings, only then mark your cuts and proceed.  Don't store markers with tips facing down or up: If a marker is stored with tip upside, it becomes too dry to write, if stored with tip downside, ink gets over collected at the tip and blots, damaging the items beneath or drying up soon after.  Don't paint any surface on a rainy day: As there is lot of moisture in the air, paints take longer to dry. If you assume they might have dried, they will end up spoiling your stuff.  Don;t cut ribbon straight across: Cutting a ribbon straight pulls threads away, instead cut it at 45-degree angle.  Don't cut a rug with scissors: If you are working on a DIY rug shape, cutting an existing rug, then don't use scissors, instead use a Crafts/Workman's knife, it stops frayed ends.  Wait for the paint to dry: For any paint project-- canvas, wall, decals, furniture-- wait until the first coat of paint dries to start the next coat. Or wait for one color to dry totally to start the next/ contrast color in the remaining area of the surface. Or wait for the paint to dry completely to decorate your flowers in the vase you painted, the pollen or petals of the flowers (natural or artificial) might stick to the wet paint and worsen.     

SALT SPEAKS   Stained Coffee Mug? Pour half a teaspoon of salt into a stained coffee cup or teacup, scrub with a dry paper towel, then rinse. The alkaline in the salt gets rid of discoloration from coffee or tea like magic.  Rusty Surface? Use a paste of six tablespoons salt and two tablespoons lemon or lime juice on a dry cloth to wipe away rust from almost anything metal, like bicycles, outdoor furniture and tools. Rinse and dry thoroughly.  Wine Spills on Fabrics? Don't clean a wine stain with a wet cloth. It will make it worse. Instead, blot the area with a dry cloth or  white paper napkin, then pour on a heaping mound of salt-it will help lift the stain and color off the fabric. Let it sit  for 30 mins, then blot clean with cold water and wash the fabric.  Stinky Kitchen Sink? Kitchen sinks often smell odd, due to food not being drained well, or sticking around. Add a heaped tablespoon of salt to a quart of boiling water, then pour it down the drain to clear away the odor causing grease.  Pests in the Garden? Sprinkle salt where pests lie in gardens. Its easy to sweep when the pests lay weak and then drop  them in a bucket of salty water.  Kosher Salt to clean Cast -Iron skillets: Add a splash of water and a teaspoon of these coarse crystals to a cast-iron skillet, then use a paper towel to wipe off food without causing the pan to lose its seasoning.  Sea-Salt for Body: This salt makes a great exfoliating body scrub. Just mix two parts sea salt and one part grape seed oil. 

కలసి పని చేసుకుంటూ సర్దుకుపోదాం     మొన్న ఆదివారం మా ఫ్రెండ్స్ అందరం కుటుంబాలతో సహా ఓ చిన్న పార్టీలో కలిశాం. ఇక ఏముంది,ఎప్పటిలాగే మీరూ, మేమూ అంటూ శ్రీవార్లు అంతా ఓ పార్టీ, శ్రీమతులంతా ఓ పార్టీలాగా చీలిపోయి కాసేపు వాదించుకున్నాం. ఈసారి వాదనకి టాపిక్ "ఎవరు ఎవరి మీద ఎక్కువగా ఆధారపడుతున్నారు?" అని. ఇలాంటి ఓ ప్రశ్న అడగాలే కానీ మగవాళ్ళని "పరాన్న జీవులు" అని నిరుపించేదాకా ఊరుకోము కదా మనం. అదే ప్రయత్నం చేసాం మేమూ కూడా. కాసేపు ఎంతో సరదాగా, ఆ తర్వాత మరికొంత సీరియస్ గా సాగిన మా వాద ప్రతివాదనల సారాంశం ఏంటో ఒకసారి చూద్దామా...! మీరు మామీద ఆధారపడతారంటే మగవాళ్ళకి పౌరుషం వస్తుంది కానీ, అదెంత నిజమో వాళ్ళకి మాత్రం తెలియదా చెప్పండి ? ఆ నిజాన్ని ఒప్పుకోవటానికి కష్టమనిపించి మాతో వాదనకి దిగారు. మేము స్కూటర్ పై లిఫ్టు ఇస్తే ఆఫీసుకి టైంకి వెళతారు. మేమూ పిల్లలని చూసుకుంటే మీరు ఫ్రెండ్స్ తో పార్టీలకి వెళ్ళగలరు అంటూ ఇలా సాగిపోయింది మగవాళ్ళ వాదన. ఆ మాట అన్నారో లేదో మా సమత ఒక్క ఉదుటున వాళ్ళపై కయ్యిమని లేచింది ."ఏంటీ మేం అన్ని సిద్దం చేస్తే చక్కగా ఆఫీసుకి వెళుతూ, మమ్మల్ని దారిలో దింపటం మేం మీ మీద ఆధారపడ్డట్టా? పిల్లలని చూడటం మాకేదో సహాయపడ్డట్టు చెబుతున్నారేంటీ ? పిల్లలు మీ బాద్యత కాదా ? అన్న మా సమత ఎటాక్ కి కాసేపు కౌంటర్ లేకుండా పోయిందనుకోండి. ఎవరు ఎవరిమీద ఎక్కువ ఆధారపడతారు ? అనగానే ఎవరికీ వారు మీరే మాపై ఆధారపడతారు. మేం లేనిదే మీకు పూట కూడా గడవదు అంటూ తెగ వాదించుకున్నాం. ఇంతలో మా సమత భర్త రమేష్ "ఓ విషయంలో మాత్రం మేం మీపై చాలా ఎక్కువ ఆధార పడతామని చెప్పాలి" అనగానే మేమంతా "హుర్రే "అంటూ అరిచాం. తీరా చూస్తే ఆయన ఏమన్నాడో తెలుసా! ఉదయాన్నే ప్రశాంతంగా పేపర్ చదువుతున్నా, టీవీలో క్రికెట్ మ్యాచ్ చూస్తున్నా బోర్ గా వుంటుంది. ప్రక్కన మీ సణుగుడు ఉందనుకోండి భలే సరదాగా వుంటుంది అని అనేసాడు. అలా అనగానే రమేష్ గారి తలపై ఓ మొట్టికాయ పడిందనుకోండి. చాలాసార్లు ఈ ఆధారపడడం అనేది భార్యాభర్తలని మానసికంగా బలహీనులని చేస్తుందట. అంటే తను ఉంది కదా అన్న భరోసా మగవారిని ఇంటి విషయాల పట్ల నిర్లక్ష్యంగా ఉండేలా చేస్తే, అన్నీ తను చూసుకుంటారులే అని భార్యలు ఎన్నో వ్యవహారాలతో భర్తపై ఆధారపడతారు. సహజంగా ఈ ఆధారపడడం అనేది ఓ అలవాటుగా మారి చివరికి నాకు చేతకాదులే అని ఎవరికివారు ప్రగాడంగా, సమ్మేతంగా మారుతుందట. అంటే ఆధారపడడం అన్నది మన "శక్తియుక్తులని" ఎదగనీయకుండా చేస్తుంది అన్నమాట. అన్ని సవ్యంగా జరిగినప్పుడు పర్వాలేదు కానీ, కదిలే కాలంలో మనం మన భాగస్వామి భాధ్యతలని మోయాల్సి వచ్చినప్పుడు తీవ్రమైన కృంగుబాటుతో నిస్సహాయంగా నిలబడతమాట. ఈ మధ్య చేసిన ఓ అధ్యయనంలో భార్యాభర్తల మధ్య ఈ "ఆధారపడడం" అన్నది ఎంత తీవ్ర ప్రభావాలని చూపిస్తోందని పరిశీలించినప్పుడు... ఒక్కోసారి పక్కన తను లేనిదే జీవితమే లేదు అన్నంత నిస్సహాయ స్థితిలో జారిపోతున్నారట భార్యాభర్తలు. దీనికి పరిష్కారం అన్నింటిని సమర్ధించుకోగల సామర్ధ్యాన్ని భార్యాభర్తలు ఇద్దరు కలిగి ఉండగలగటం. ఆ తర్వాత ఆధారపడటం అన్నది వారి సామర్ధ్యాన్ని ఏమాత్రం దెబ్బతీయదు. అందుకే ఎవరి పనులు వారు కాక, ఎదుట వారి పనులలో కూడా కాస్త పట్టుని సాధించటానికి ప్రయత్నించాలట. ఇదండీ అసలు విషయం. మరి మీరేమంటారు ?    

  With more than 1,30,000 leprosy patients in India, it accounts for 54 per cent of all new leprosy cases reported in the world where lepers are still treated as untouchables and forced to live in isolation. This has been the same state of affairs since the Gandhian era where he tried his best to help remove the stigma about leprosy among Indians.     Kabita Bhattarai is a lone crusader in the battle against leprosy now in India. She has an ashram in a remote corner near the Bihar-Nepal border, where she has treated nearly half a million patients for free in her 240-bed leprosy hospital. Kabita manages 21 leprosy colonies, provides free education to over 1,000 children. The model she has evolved is quite innovative. Patients get admitted for free treatment of their disease and in turn, their family members work voluntarily at the fields, hospital, school and dairy farms owned by her organization called 'Little Flower'. The peripheral activities that 'Little Flower' generate enough income to sustain its core activity of treating leprosy patients.     Kabita is akin to a modern day Mother Teresa and Teluguone salutes her.      

CORRECTING DESIGN MISTAKES   Mistake 1: Wrong-Size Curtains     We often mess up with the curtain lengths. Choosing tab-top or grommet styles enables us to increase the height if we find them short after bringing the curtains home, these styles slide easily onto the rod. To find the right panel length, measure from the floor to just above the window casing. Mount the rod to match panel length, rather than the other way around, as you would for custom-made curtains. Panels should be as wide as the window and rod brackets mounted six inches outside the frame so panels can be pushed away from the glass easily.  Mistake 2:High Art   Hanging stuff can be tricky. The first step is to figure out the correct hanging height. Hang your art at the average person’s height -- roughly 57 inches from the floor -- so that most eyes can look straight and see it comfortably. Mistake 3:Disjointed Frames Unless you're really good with mix-and-match looks, keep it simple and pick frames with a common style or frame color for all. A streamlined look takes the guesswork out of the design and allows the viewer to focus on the art itself. Mistake 4:Too Studied May be you browsed so many Design magazines and decorated a room which is technically stunning -- but, what’s missing? A little bit of you. Add a few pieces that have a warm backstory, stack beloved books on the coffee table, or layer in some photos of the people you love. It’s possible to make a room look too slick, more like a furniture shop than a home. Think about what speaks to your heart, even if its a little pop of the Orange or Terracota color you love, and add that personal touch. Mistake 5:Ignoring Scale and Proportion Does your room feel sort of underwhelming? Or way too crowded? You may have an issue with scale, which means the visual size of things, and how they look in relation to each other and the space. For your pieces to stand out, rooms need big things and little things, tall things and short things. It’ll make things look a lot more interesting Mistake 6:Lack of Storage No matter how beautiful you want your room to look, when you start using it, you will need a place to keep the magazines, newspapers you read daily, you need a place to keep the throw or the multiple remotes we use. Take a look around your room and see where you can comfortably add more places to put things away -- the easier to reach the better. Consider bare wall space first -- anywhere to mount shelving or cabinetry? Can you add side tables with drawers? Any missed opportunities for built-ins? In bedrooms, consider building shelving around the headboard, and adding storage boxes beneath the bed. Mistake 7:Cluttered Decor It's easy to pack your rooms with way too much stuff, but that look can easily become clutter. Solve the issue by clearing off every surface in a room, one by one, and returning only half the things on it. If you have 4 pillows on a sofa, too many picture frames on walls, too many flower vases, or too many flowers in the vases, be your own tough editor and store the objects that didn't make the cut this time. You can bring them out next season -- or make a donation trip to the secondhand store.

JUTE ROPE VASES     You forget sometimes to return the drink or soda bottles to the shop and then think twice to dispose those glassware. Here is a very inexpensive idea to turn them into beautiful vases, and they are climate friendly.  Wash and dry glass bottles that you like to decorate. Buy more than enough jute rope, thin is proportion for easy and slimmer look. Keep a few acrylic or oil paints of your choice, handy with a few paint brushes. Strong glue. Once the bottles are dry, start applying a nice coat of glue circle by circle as you start winding the jute rope around the bottle, inorder to avoid drying the glue even before you wind the rope.  Once the rope dries well, start painting with the choice of your colors, or you can even leave the jute color as is. You beautiful jute glass vases are ready.    Suggestion: If the rim is wide, use them to hold pencils even. a bottle with an amazing shape can even be used as a gift. And who says you should empty the bottle, let the drink still be in the bottle and you decorate the bottle and use them in parties, ofcourse, smaller group parties so that you can decorate without getting too tired. You can paint the name of the person or the occasion on the bottle too.