Don't Let Your Bad Experiences Hurt You

 

 

Everyone of us does go through hard times in life. Not always does life turn out to be the way we want it to be and we end up having some unpleasant memories. It is tough to deal with it, but as they say the show must go on and so we need to accept them take them in our stride and move on in life. Forgiveness is vital for us to move on. Dont cling on to those memories. If someone hurt you, just forgive them and make your life better. Constantly analyzing the past in search of finding blame, including finding ways of blaming yourself, rarely leads to a positive result. Normally when you have a negative experience, it will have an initial negative and emotional impact on you for a while, but after a period, you will start to focus on other things and your brain will process the emotion and the memory will be filed as over and in the past tense and the impact will fade.

But for some people, especially if the experience is of a horrific nature, they can often struggle to process the memory and the emotional experience. It’s usually the case that a whole number of factors lead to the result you’re now experiencing everything acts like a domino with one thing leading to another. Just accept it: what happened, happened.The logical sequence of events would have been that the person would not have been so cruel to begin with, and that anyone who would have been so cruel would have apologized. You brain is waiting on the appropriate response. You cannot literally just erase or wipe out your bad memories because there are etched and engrained into your life story and experience, in other words they are a part of you. What you can and probably should do though is, you can detach the negative emotions and the stressful physical responses, which are causing you all the pain, away from the memory, so the bad experience becomes neutral and no longer relevant and significant.

We often tend to imagine what we could have said or done differently to avoid the bad things that happened. But this is no different from trying to change what happened a thousand years ago it’s quite impossible. So behave differently: fill your mind with alternative thoughts. Psychologists argue that powerful positive ideas can help you get off the endless track of negative thoughts. Imagine yourself doing something new and exciting or actually plan something fun for the coming days. Also Staying busy and hobbies is helpful as a tactic to cope with recurring issues. seek the help of a support group, engage in social activities - even if you have to force yourself at first. You may also want to occupy your time with exercise, reading and music. Seek spiritual consultation, or if you are finding it especially difficult to move past your experience, you may want to begin counseling. All this can help you move past a bad experience, but the most important thing to keep in mind is that what you are feeling is natural, so let yourself feel those emotions and know that it will get better.


..Divya