You Might Be a Nurse if

# when using a public restroom, you wash your hands with soap for a full minute and turn off the faucets with your elbows.

# your favorite dream is the one where you leave a mess at a patient's bedside and tell a doctor to clean it up.

# men assume you must be great in bed because of the billion p*rn movies about nurses.

# everyone, including complete strangers, tells you about each and every ache and pain they have.

# you want to put your foot through the TV screen every time you see a nurse on a soap opera doing nothing but talking on the phone and flirting with doctors.

# you can almost SEE the germs on doorknobs and telephones.

# you can watch the goriest movie and eat anything afterwards, even spagetti with lots of tomato sauce.

# you use a plastic 30cc medicine cup for a shotglass.