Funny Dialogues and Mixed Jokes

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Girl: Damned my cheeks are cold! Brah

Me: Which ones?

Friend: LMAO

Me: Are you talking about your face of cheeks...or...buttcheeks... I don't know lol?

Girl: You hole hits me in the face and friend.

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Having moved into his first apartment, our son invited my husband and I for a visit.

As we walked in, our son asked if we'd like a cold drink.

Mentally patting myself on the back for teaching him to be such a gracious host, I said, "Yes, what do you have?"

He walked over to the refrigerator, opened the door, studied the contents, and then replied, "I have pickle juice or water."

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TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.

MARIA: Here it is!

TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America?

CLASS : Maria! Me: Care to squeeze it?

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Girl: What??? lol?

Me: My Caprison...meaning care to have a drink of Caprison with irresistible flavors.

Girl: Ok...ummmm, sure.

Me: Mind That's right you can't stand the heat...suck it

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Lawyer: Did you blow your horn or anything?

Witness: After the accident?

Lawyer: Before the accident.

Witness: Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it.

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