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Before And After Marriage

Before And After Marriage

Before - You take my breath away.

After - I feel like I'm suffocating.


Before - She says she loves the way I take control of a situation.

After - She called me a controlling, manipulative egomaniac.


Before - Saturday Night Fever

After - Monday Night Football


Before - Don't stop.

After - Don't start.


Before - Is that all you're having?

After - Maybe you should have just a salad, Honey.


Before- $60/doz.

After - $1.50/stem


Before- We agree on everything.

After - Doesn't she have a mind of her own?


Before - Victoria's Secret

After - Fruit-of-the-Loom


Before - Charming and Noble

After - Chernobyl


Before - Idol

After - Idle


Before - I love a woman with curves.

After - I never said you were fat.


Before - He's completely lost without me.

After - Why won't he ever ask for directions?


Before - Time stood still.

After - This relationship is going nowhere.


Before - Croissant and cappuccino

After - Bagel and instant


Before - You look so seductive in black.

After - Your clothes are so depressing.


Before- Oysters After - Fishsticks

After - I can hardly believe we found each other.


Before - Passion

After - Ration


Before - Once upon a time

After - The end


 
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